“I’ll meet you at the end of the tunnel. Just keep heading towards the light and I’ll wait for you there”.
Words of encouragement from my teenage son as he sped off and left me at the mouth of a long and very dark tunnel. I’d already endured the many ‘family jokes’ as I had tentatively mounted a bike for the first time in almost 4 decades a few minutes earlier. “Do you need stabilisers Mum?” “Shall we run alongside you and catch you as you fall off?” I’d put on a fairly convincing show so far and they thought that I had conquered it, and I’d be fine if they went on ahead. A few minutes into the planned 13-mile biking trip on our summer family holiday I’d reassured them that it was true that ‘you never forgot how to ride a bike’. But as my husband and our two kids sped on ahead, they had little idea that I was beginning to find this tougher than I’d thought at this precise moment. The wide-open sunny countryside was one thing but entering a very dark concrete tunnel with rougher terrain was quite another! Confidence disappeared and I slowed down, got very wobbly and almost came off altogether. I was just desperate to get to the end and get back into the space and light again. So, I firmly kept my eyes fixed on the light at the end of the tunnel, hoping I was going to make it in one piece.
That vivid memory reminds me of a conversation with a church operations leader recently, who expressed feeling as though everyone else is coming out the ‘COVID tunnel’ of the last 2 years, but they’re not sure if they’re going to make it in one piece. They still feel very much in the dark – where the going is tough, their confidence is lost and they’re feeling ‘wobbly’.
The ‘COVID tunnel’ has felt longer than perhaps any of us anticipated. As we entered initially it was dark and we were all in it together. Then as vaccines appeared and restrictions lifted, it seemed that the light at the end of the tunnel we’d been praying for was almost with us. But as we got nearer it wasn’t the transition into the light from the end of the tunnel after all. The improved light was due to less dark walls, but it wasn’t over yet, and we had to keep going. That ebb and flow of darker days, more variants and increased restrictions mixed in with better news of falling infection rates and restrictions easing. The up and down journey has been with us for 2 years now. For many of us – not all, but many – this has taken a toll. We’re possibly exhausted on levels we cannot really understand right now. For some of us - as it looks as though the end of the COVID tunnel really is in sight now – our confidence in our call and God given ability and gifts has gone. Motivation is low and if we’re honest with ourselves we just feel a bit wobbly right now.
“I’m right beside you. You’re fine……keep going….almost there”. I hadn’t realised in the dark but my husband - seeing I had fallen some way behind had come back to find me. In my increasing panic I hadn’t noticed him in the blur of people going past me on the opposite side as I was just focusing on trying to make it out. Suddenly he was there right beside me. My best friend and life companion. And everything felt better! I wasn’t on my own and I knew that however slowly I was going, and even if I came off completely, I’d be ok and he’d make sure I got out on one piece.
However, you feel today, I pray that you’ll live in the scriptural truth that Jesus came to save you and call you by name to be with him today and for eternity. That truth means that, even if you feel as if you’re in a dark tunnel, you are NOT alone. Jesus – your life companion, best friend and saviour is right beside you, encouraging you to keep going and reassuring you He’s with you. He’s not like my teenage son who had sped ahead and was faithfully waiting for me in the light as he had promised. Jesus will never leave you. He’s right beside you as you wobble and lack confidence. He’ll make sure that HIS light - HIS presence – stays with you and guides you forwards. Even if you’re doubting that you can make it out in one piece, Jesus’ presence, and love right at your side will make sure that you do.
I am Light that has come into the world so that all who believe in me won't have to stay any longer in the dark. (John 12 vs 46. MSSG)
Jules
Jules Morgan
Chair of the UCAN Board of Directors
(PS. And yes… I made it to the end of the tunnel in one piece, back into the sunny August sun and onto complete a longggg but very lovely ride.)